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Battle of the Birthdays


There are certain times of year when it seems to be everyone’s birthday in my circle. I credit this to the fact that I am attracted to certain zodiac signs way more than others.

Hence, at these peak times of year, I am in a tizzy because I must decide whose Saturday night birthday party to attend (as everyone always wants to throw it on the Saturday closest to their actual Bday, hoping to have the best turnout).

It became necessary to develop a formula. When it’s hard to decide between friends, I ask myself: How much do I love said friend? Am I obligated (bestie, family)? Did this person attend my birthday party? Is it convenient to get to the party and worth me spending time and money? Will my frenemies be there and do I feel like dealing with them? And least of all for me but still important: Do I have anything to wear? (Everyone’s seen my clothes 1000 times. Time to hire a personal shopper since I hate shopping yet love acquiring new things.)

The factors that play into this choice are simple yet unpredictable to other parties involved and often mind-numblingly dull yet necessary to indecisive me.

Last weekend, I had to make a choice. I was able to hit up two birthday parties out of three involved, which I think is an achievement in itself for far-away places and different groups of friends.

Stats for the one I skipped:

Friend? Check. Like him? Yes, but not obligated. My Bday party? No show. Hotel Chantelle? Too out of the way. Time & money well spent? No, he’ll be too wasted to remember I showed up…until someone posts pictures. Frenemies attending? Questionable. Anything to wear? Nope, bored with my closet.

It’s as simple as that, folks. Feel free to use my decision-making BDay formula to determine which parties will make you Happy.


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